The last couple days have been a struggle to get everyone ready and out the door in the morning.  I have three boys and I have “Dad duty” every morning to get us all ready for the day and dropped off at school/daycare.

I am not complaining at all, in fact I value the time I have with my boys in the morning, especially because of the evenings I am gone with church stuff.  The biggest challenge has been with our youngest who just turned 4, and this morning I realized at least one of the reasons why.

I am very (very, very, very) happy to be done with the baby stage.  No more five point car seats, no more feeding schedules, no more diapers, no more…(I could go on but if you have a baby I don’t want to depress you too much).  When I see families with babies or toddlers it only reminds me how glad I am to be done with that phase of our life.

This morning as Cameron struggled with his attitude (and so did I) I realized that my expectations of him were not realistic.  I am so glad for our boys to have some independence I forget what is appropriate for a four year old.  His older brothers can do it, so he should be able to as well…but I easily forget that they are two and four years older than him.

For him to learn and mature I need to have realistic expectations and take the time to help and teach him.  Otherwise we will both be extremely frustrated, which is not good for either one of us.  But it isn’t just about me, I have to teach and he has to learn and try.

What is true in the physical world is often times true in the Spiritual world.

Hebrews 5:11-14 (NIV) We have much to say about this, but it is hard to make it clear to you because you no longer try to understand. In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God’s word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.

Here we see some lazy Christians being called out on their lack of growth.  As a spiritual leader I need to have realistic expectations for those I am teaching and discipling, and they need to learn, try, and actually grow.

Take a moment and think about how many students in your sphere of influence need milk and now many need solid food.  Is your teaching and your expectations appropriate?  If they aren’t growing what needs to change?  Is it you?  Is it them?  Most likely it is a combination of both.

I realize for me with my own kids and for the teenagers God has put in my life it is a combination of both.  How about for you?